Cyberstalking Is Not Taken As a Serious Crime

Cyberstalking has exceeded physical harassment according to the latest research. Cyberstalking takes place on social networking sites, emails and mobile phones and is quite different from face to face stalking.

Echo (Electronic Communication Harassment Observation) surveyed victims (aged 20-39 years)of cyberstalking at Bedford University, England. The harassers can be total strangers, ex partners or casual acquaintance.

Interesting revelation was that 40% of cyberstalking victims are men although previous studies always showed women were the victims mostly.

Psychologists feel that the danger lies in the fact that police does not take cyberstalking seriously although it causes psychological harm to victims. At least, 1/3rd of the victims felt psychological stress and trouble. The biggest category of stalkers fall in the strangers category and the victims never get to know who is harassing them.

One of the victims said she was sent lots of vivid images of violent rape to harass her. It is stranger to understand why stalkers choose certain people and what do they actually get out of cyberstalking. Sadly, it is not taken as a serious crime yet.

I have noticed how researchers, psychologists and observers are trying to highlight the issues of technology, cyber bullying and cyberstalking time and again but governments and law enforcing agencies are not paying heed.

The fact remains that the world is being ruled by internet and such a huge thing is bound to have criminal activities so it does need some attention. It is just like AIDS, accidents, illnesses most people feel it is not going to happen to them - but it can happen with anyone. It is about time, that the states realize the significance of cyberstalking.

Take it or Fuck it! (Bloggers' Plight)

Once in a while, we writers/bloggers need to write something of the sort. I won’t really call it catharsis. In fact, I won’t even call it bitching. Just because we cover certain stories revolving around nude photos of celebrities (which is quite an in thing these days), it doesn’t mean we are into it ourselves. I know how I sound when I write, but that doesn’t mean that I’m interested in fucked up strangers. I have friends & I do have admirers. I’m quite content with them.

And I have written on illegitimate kids & how they are being killed in broad day light a number of times but not a single Muslim has ever bothered to leave comment on it. I have written on innumerable rape cases. I have written on our statute book. I write about animal rights all the time. I have written on depression & suicide in which insensitive people were blaming the victims. When I wrote on incest where I didn’t mention any religion, some psychos dragged in religion. I do have interest in Science & I did share a number of articles but not even once anyone was smart enough to say a word.

Look if nude pictures excite you, it’s not my fucking headache. It’s just a story & I work hard on every story. I don’t give 2 fucks if closed minds don’t read them or they only bother to notice popular posts.

The thing is…it’s easier to talk to people on the net, which is why we get messages from just anyone. In real life, no one dares to talk to me, cause I really don’t have friendly personality. Anyone who has been reading me would also avoid talking to me, if he/she has brain cells.

I remember when that god-damn blognetwork was created, a guy named Farhan had issues. Instead of commenting on the blog, he used to get personal on the blognetwork. He didn’t understand what was written but he made it a point to say something every day. Then another guy wanted me to die of cancer. When I wrote something about myself few months ago, that link was given to my brother. Listen, if you have issues with me, then you must stay away from my websites. I never ask anyone to read or comment on my blogs. My sister is not on talking terms with certain creeps...even they bothered me with mails. What the hell! If someone is not responding to your text messages or mails that is a reply in itself. What is there so difficult to understand?

If my sister is not talking to you for whatever reason, please don't bother me. I don't like to make friends with strangers. I rarely delete people from my list. If I have deleted you, it means that I don’t ever want to talk to you.

Blogging is a very personal thing. You can write about anything. It’s just that we live in a world where people have too many norms & they don’t like it when someone’s honest. I have even come across people who think I am a man but this is entirely their headache. If you are a habitual liar, everyone may seem to be lying. What I write is not Gospel. I never say that it’s the final word. But people have always had issues. And quite frankly, I don’t give a fuck to it. I write, cause I like to write & I really don’t care what everyone thinks.

Ragging & Bullying

‘Why do you think they targeted you?’

‘Because they’re dickheads? I don’t know. They’re like a pack. They have to make someone else feel like shit in order to feel good about themselves.’

Jodi Picoult

I saw Hostel (the Indian movie on ragging) & it’s definitely an eye opener. These students commit all sorts of crimes & very conveniently call it ragging. They choose specific students & then go on bullying them forever. On top of it, they have the audacity to say that we are helping them out; they won’t be able to survive in the world & we’re making them real men. And in this process, they even rape them.

Actually I want to talk about bullying & harassment basically, but it won’t be fair if I won’t talk about the movie. It’s not a must watch. The protagonist is the only guy who looks like a student; the rest of them are really too old & they seem more like street thugs or chauffeurs. And these bastards are after one boy; he even commits suicide in the end. In fact a teacher also supports these bullies & he’s so shameless that even makes out with a whore in front of his students.

I once read this study on bullies. They are basically mentally sick people. They might have suffered & so they make sure they hurt others. It makes them feel good. But I don’t think a victim would be interested in the history of someone who is mentally or physically harassing him. And I don’t even see any justification. If someone has tortured you, go after that person rather than bullying innocent people.

Bullying anyone anywhere is a serious felony, but unfortunately, these culprits get away with it. People who ought to be behind bars go on harassing anyone who is weaker than them. It’s pure mental torture & a person can commit suicide, but no one ever takes it seriously except the victims.

Cyber bullying is another way of harassing people on the net. In this one, the victims have no option but to ignore the bullies. I have never seen any site taking any action whatsoever against those who bully. Actually I have been a victim myself & it has been 6 years. Now I don’t care, cause you eventually grow. It has been so long that my family & friends only make fun of him. In fact I have also not heard anyone who has been cyber bullied for so long. Usually it lasts for a year. I guess as long as I’m on the net, this thing would continue.

The fact is people are harassed everywhere & there’s not much that can be done about it. While I was in the university, I often used to hear about these harassment cases in which teachers bullied their students. Even we had one such piece in our department. What makes these harassment cases far more dangerous is how people talk & spread rumors. Some students are of course sensitive but some students are just plain bitchy. When I was bothered by my professor, I also got this call from my senior that all the students (juniors & seniors) had this discussion & they think that I ought to leave the uni, cause the teacher cannot concentrate. Naturally I went to my Chairman the next day & everything was taken care, but while I was there, some students couldn’t get over it. It was a terrible experience for me but I had the support of 2 teachers.

I have never been able to understand why do people keep mum about such things. More than that, when someone informs, no action is taken against the culprits.

I think last year, a teenager was severely beaten up by 4 girls & they even made the video, & you could see that on Youtube. However, the clip was removed, but you can imagine the torment that poor girl must have been through. They used to bully her on a daily basis & then they even humiliated her on the net.

This thing happens everywhere but still we have people who ask the rotten question ‘why you of all people?’ I don’t think we can have all the answers, but this world would be a better place, if people become a little understanding & compassionate. They make matters even worse. We go to school, college & university to acquire knowledge but look at the irony we are bullied & humiliated there by a bunch of psychos who ought to be in mental asylums.

Which reminds me of this school in Pakistan where students were being raped & not just that, they were even forced to prostitute themselves. Teachers were involved. In fact 6 staff members were together in this heinous crime & this practice went on for 20 years till some ex students dared to speak up against this.

I have 2 questions: Can we actually ignore this? And does it give everyone the right to judge the victims? You may never know but you could know someone who is seriously into bullying people. You can’t really know whether someone is ever whom they seem to be.

You are not my judges

“I have only one judge – myself - & I acquit myself.”

Jean-Paul Sartre

We all have stories. We all have problems. We all have had bad experiences. However, not everyone wants people to sympathize with him/her. I believe we encounter tough times for a reason…so that we become better & strong individuals. I think we don’t need courage to die; we need courage to live.

Anyway, there is no such thing on this planet as an absolutely right view point. If a person analyses anything from all the possible angles with honesty, it is quite a task to arrive at a single conclusion. Moreover, our background & experiences are accountable to a greater extent in shaping & forming our opinions.

In Moll Flanders, the protagonist said:

“In the next place, when a woman is thus left desolate & void of counsel, she is just like a bag of money or a jewel dropped on the highway, which is a prey to the next comer; if a man of virtue & upright principles happens to find it, he will have it cried, & the owner may come to hear of it again; but how many times shall such a thing fall into hands that will make no scruple of seizing it for their own, to once that it shall come into good hands?”

Daniel Defoe

Actually this passage has nothing to do with what I have in my mind, but it triggered me to think. Owing to discrimination & how problems are being depicted, it’s difficult to say whose problem is the biggest. However, problems are problems…they could be insurmountable & may not have any solution. I think men, women, old people, children, eunuchs, sluts, animals – they all have genuine problems.

Work place harassment is nothing new. In fact, harassment of any kind is not new. And I don’t know if at this point, I should say that people ought to understand. They say education could make a difference. I don’t know. I have seen innumerable educated jahils (illiterates). They say education could bring about a revolution. My question is: how is it possible? Education in our part of the world does not guarantee change of mental outlook towards life.

When I was in the university, we used to hear about cases of harassment. Teachers blackmailing students, cause grades were in their hands. Almost every department had one such exotic (read corrupt) piece.

During the 2nd semester, one of our professors was being very, very, kind on me. Naturally you get to know when things aren’t right. Although he never hurt me in any way, besides showing interest, but he stopped teaching us in the classroom & started talking about irrelevant stuff. I told my friends & thanks to them, the entire class knew it. Students were pissed off as he was a good teacher & he wasn’t teaching but babbling shit.

As usual students were discussing & a day came when one of my seniors called me & said that the teacher has gone off his head…he can’t concentrate, & they all think the right step is that I must leave the university. And she even asked me if it was a case of sexual harassment. I was quite pissed off. The next day, I went to the Chairman & narrated the entire story. This was a story in which students played an active role by discussing & presuming & wondering if it was something sexual. Yeah I know it’s my hard luck. I always get attention from the wrong kind of people. And no I didn’t have any fun whatsoever. As if people enjoy getting unwanted attention!

Anyway, I said to the Chairman that if anybody ought to leave the university, it should be the teacher, not me. And I even suggested that there is no need to teach students Tess of the D’urbervilles, as it doesn’t make much of a difference on their brain cells. They are the ones who love to ask juicy questions; they are the ones who can’t help giving new dimension to a problem; they are the ones who said I was being favoured & I got good marks that I didn’t deserve. Although it didn’t occur to those nitwits that I used to get good marks in all the subjects. And other teachers were not crazy after me.

I was lucky in the sense that the Chairman & another female teacher supported me. That professor was warned. It wasn’t easy for me to face the problem at that time though. I wanted moral support & I didn’t get any from my friends & best people. However, I got that support & protection from 2 teachers. One of them is dead & it's a great loss. He said to me that it’s our duty to inform about such incidents & he was thankful for that as no one ever had the courage to report about that teacher’s colourful nature.

My story is nevertheless not that scary or creepy, but there was pressure on me all along & I haven’t forgotten that. The point I want to highlight is that people around you make sure you have no peace; people around you make sure that you know what others are talking about you; people around you invent baseless stories; people around you know what you should do with your life & if accidentally you ask them what do they plan to do themselves…they might not have any answer, cause they are busy thinking as to what steps others should take. No wonder we haven’t stepped in the 21st century. It’s another thing that people are shedding clothes in our country. It’s like they equate nudity with progress. But they don’t know what’s the progress of mind.

“People only do what they want to do - & what they are capable of doing. If they were capable of anything else, there would be something else.”

D. H. Lawrence

Anyhow, I’ve learnt one thing from my bad experiences. When you come across someone nice, make sure you tell that person. Since everyone is not stupid & limited, I really don’t see the point why one must try to outdo others. If you’re satisfied with yourself…That’s more than enough. Do you really need to make an impression? Anyway, when fumes come out of your ears, make sure you share that candy with the one who is responsible for those fumes.


Nadira Rahman