I have 2 questions & they can be taken as just 1: How compassionate are you when jealousy strikes at your door? Can you have compassion for someone who’s capable of killing you? My answer would be no but yes I’d try to understand as to why someone wants bad things to happen to me. Few years ago, I read this report about a woman killing both her parents with an axe. It happened in Ramazan. She was mentally ill. Her husband left her & she had 2 kids & she wanted to get married again but she said that her mother was not interested. After staying in the jail for 2 years, she herself also committed suicide. It’s difficult to be compassionate when we hear such cases. And it’s easy to use the word judgmental for those who can’t be compassionate.
We have heard of rivalry & jealous amongst siblings. We also have the example of Cane & Abel. It is said that Abel, the first murder victim, is sometimes seen as the first martyr; while Cain, the first murderer, is sometimes seen as a progenitor of evil.
I also read:
“It seems as old as time itself, and yet the mystery of what to do about jealousy between siblings has yet to be solved. The new baby coming home may upset its older sibling. Brothers and sisters who are close in age will feel the need to compete, and for unknown reasons one sibling may have feelings of resentment towards another that can (and many times will) last throughout their adulthood.”
Actually I have a couple of things in my mind. People say that a mother can never be mean but then we hear of cases in which mothers have killed their children. There is also a view that jealousy cannot exist between siblings. I think these views have come from people who want everyone to think that there is nothing wrong in this world. And if you depict the world as shit pot, then you have invented stories that are preposterous for the worldly mind.
When I was in college, somebody narrated this hilarious story that a mother sleeps between her son & his wife. We just couldn’t believe it as it sounded extremely funny. In our part of the world, mother-in-law is regarded as vamp & daughter-in-law is mostly considered some character from the movies who puts up with shit & doesn’t even complain. In simple words, I call it lack of imagination as anyone can be vamp.
Anyway, in all these years, I’ve seen that jealousy is something that can exist anywhere & in any relationship. A daughter can be jealous of her mother. A mother would have problems with the wife of her son. Sister can be jealous of another sister. Siblings can look down on the one who is not like them.
We live once & I really don’t see the point of having grudges against people who have hurt me at some point or who targeted me for whatever reason. I don’t like to resume friendship with such people though. And there are also some people who have never been my friend but they surely have problem with me…those people are called cousins from my maternal side, in plain English. Since I already have enemies, so it doesn’t really matter what I say. Those who don’t know me may regard me as someone who likes to bitch 24/7 & is also very shameless. But their opinion is not that important.
My history is something like this…I wouldn’t have been born, had my brother Aurangzeb not died. My mother still misses him & both my parents were extremely hurt. He was a blond & a very beautiful baby. Anyhow, I was born after a year & at that very time, my father also got promoted. And both my parents decided that they wouldn’t raise the topic of divorce again as they now have 2 daughters. I was considered very lucky for my parents. Everyone knows that I’m vocal but no one knows that I started talking with Papa when I was just 3 days old. And he used to visit us every weekend. My childhood was nothing short of a fairy tale. But that got me into serious trouble.
I have seen movies & have also read books in which they show rivalry between siblings but somehow they are always stepbrothers & stepsisters, never real ones. What a pity! I wonder how long we are going to take to look truth straight in the eye.
Last but not least, my kid sister is, by all means, a gift of God. If Z had been a year younger than me, then I surely would have no need for a single friend. You know God makes sure to compensate.
