They managed to get my results wrong
Showing posts with label depression. Show all posts
Showing posts with label depression. Show all posts
Thieves Steal ANOTHER Wheelchair - From 8-Year-Old Boy with Cerebral Palsy
and feel very, very sorry for myself. But optimists recuperate faster so I’m going to pretend I’m an optimist.
Wish me luck!
The NHS is main publicly funded healthcare service in the United Kingdom. Each system operates independantly, and is accountable to its relevant government who make the major decisions in its running.
It appears to me that for some unknown reason we believe everything they say and seem to automatically take their services as the best available, or the right ones for us, unless anything shows us otherwise via experience. I however question this, question whether just because it is the main healthcare provider, just because it is government funded, does this really mean I am best placed in their services? Are they always right?
I have been in the NHS Mental Health services for nearly five years now albeit the Child and Adolescent Mental Health services (CAMHS), the Recovery teams or the Eating Disorder teams. I have been both an inpatient and an outpatient and I have seen a broad range of different mental health professionals. Currently I am supported solely by the Anorexia Nervosa Service.
This service has recently opened my eyes to a few things.
At first I thought you know, the whole NHS Mental Health Service is awful, and not meeting the degree of care it should be, but then after some negotiating with myself I realised that this is a slightly unfair statement to be making. I have concluded that from my personal experiences, the Anorexia Nervosa (AN) service I use has some major faults, as does all other mental health teams.
The AN teams problem is they fail to see the bigger picture. They say that food isn’t the problem, that its what is beyond it and yet they seem to be uninterested in any problems occuring alongside an eating disorder.
I find it interesting that an eating disorder is given such focus as an individual disorder when things such as self harm aren’t. You don’t get the self harm service or the anxiety service or the OCD service. And so what happens when someone like comes a long with an eating disorder alongside depression, self harm and other symptoms? They refer you to one team for one thing, and to another for something else. But how’s that going to work? Two different teams dealing with what is essentially the same thing.
You’re expected to discuss one problem with one team, and a different problem with another team but end up lost and confused trying to work out what belongs in which sessions and come to the conclusion it’s best to say nothing at all.
They talk and deal with the symptoms of your ED and what caused that. But they don’t want to talk about the past and they don’t realise that the thing that needs dealing with is actually what underlies everything because actually you’ve got one main problem, not two or three. You skim over your past, the things that have shaped over you. You talk about them in your first sessions like they are some tiny part. And then you focus on how much you are eating and exercising or how often you self-harm, or what you spend your day doing, and you start eating more, and exercising less, cutting less, or going out more because that is what you know you have to do, and you go along with it.
Problem is its not changing the underlying problems. All these mental disorders lie with depression. Depression is the base, the foundations. And so you deal with the self harm and the eating and whatever else, but that foundation is still there so it finds another way to come out. One problem is dealt with, for another to arise because nobody is dealing with the core issues. The self-harm might stop, and be replaced, or it might go away for a while and return some time later and you will blame yourself. You ask ‘why is this happening again?’ when the truth is, its not happening again, you never dealt with it before. Not properly.
They don’t have time for you if you are not ready to change. You have a few bad weeks and you lose some weight, cut or whatever and your made to feel like you’ve done something dreadful. And it looks like theyre going to give up on you for a bit because you hear the words let’s take a therapeutic break.
Therapeutic? I would not call being left alone with your problem, where you are struggling, therapeutic. If you struggle with feeling abandoned, to be left like that, hurts. And so in an attempt to make whoever happy and to make it so they will see you again, you eat, and get you weight back up, or and write a letter about how much better you feel. Or you say you’ve stopped self-harming even if you haven’t. You say you’ve been out and done X, Y and Z when really you’ve stayed in all week. You do it for them and not you. And then you feel this huge pressure to be doing well and to hide the part of you that isn’t.
They leave you when you need them most.
They don’t ask enough questions. They don’t link things. They take things on surface value and god, if you want to end everything, well, they don’t want to know. They say its your choice. Like its what you want. Like its easy to change. Easy to want to live when you don’t. They want to be there when you want to change, they say you have to want their help. Is it not possible to want their help in a supportive way, as a person to trust and to talk to, to try keep you hanging on in there, without necessarily wanting to change or do this and that. Perhaps they need to remember you are a human. And you need someone just to be there. That everything they do and say sticks with you. You take parts personally, that you take things they say deeply.
Hey guys.
I’m one of those people who likes to read all the latest in health, diet, fitness, beauty, and style. Lately, I keep finding many posts about cleanses to help eliminate toxins and rejuvenate the body. Who wouldn’t want to do one?
The thing is, there are SO many cleanses out there! There are 30 day, 2 week, 10 day, 5 day, and even 3 day ones. And the limitations for food/beverage consumption varies among them all too.
Where do you begin??
I knew I didn’t want something that sounded unbearable to eat/drink (Master Cleanse’s cayenne pepper, lemon, and maple syrup just seems awful!), so I looked at Whole Foods to find an all-natural, and most of all, healthy, short cleanse.
I settled on Enzymatic’s Quick Renewal 5-Day Cleanse. It comes with 18 tablets and 4 packets of “Fiber Fusion daily cleansing fiber”. The best part of this? You can still eat during it! I plan to eat small, healthy meals today (I have a sushi date tonight, so I want to earn that.) and exercise, per usual, as well. I began the cleanse last night, which calls for 4 tablets with 8 oz of water at bedtime. The tablets don’t have any aftertaste or nasty flavor, so that part was easy.
I’ll keep you posted on any side effects, weight/emotion changes, or hunger cravings I experience. I’ll also let you know what exercise I’m doing and the meals I’m taking.
*If you’ve found a cleanse that works for you (or one that was terrible), tell me about your experience.
-Sirena
Quicklink: www.hispanictips.com/?p=134585
Permalink: http://www.hispanictips.com/2011/06/10/vermont-breaks-ground-in-health-coverage-for-migrant-workers/
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Thursday June 9/2011
50 Min Cardio-10 Min Run, 10 Min Stairs, 10 Min Bike, 20 Min Elliptical
3 sets:
Personal...bad health and depression
I’ve spent my day being throughly unproductive. I’ve been pissed off and tired for two straight days, and I’m starting to think the parasites that have taken over my body are at last sucking the life from me. This isn’t particularly unusual given I’ve been in a horrible state of physical health. I picked up some kind of bug last week to pile on top of everything else, and I haven’t scheduled a dentist appointment because I know I’m going to have to get fillings. I don’t particularly mind fillings, but I feel the staff at the dental office is so condescending that I get irritated just thinking about them. My apologies if I’m too stupid/backwater to take care of my teeth (in fact my teeth are what seem to suffer the most of my hygiene when I’m depressed).
I may not be as depressed as usual, but my health has certainly suffered over the years and continues to affect me. Minor cuts and bug bites on my legs are not healing, I catch upper respiratory infections at the drop of the hat, and I’m at the point I don’t even WANT to know about the state of my teeth.
I hate my health. I know I could do more to take care of myself, but I’m constantly disgusted by my body because no matter what I do I never gain weight, I have scars/stretch marks all over my body (yes, and I’m skinny as hell), my legs have veins showing, my teeth are bad, and my hair is dry and won’t grow. I am extremely frustrated, but I’m already at some kind of doctor’s every other week and I do NOT want to get involved with nutritionists and specialists that are going to harass me further about my biggest insecurity…
Sorry for this, but I am really fed up with bad health…
“The omega-3 fats in walnuts, which affect levels of the...
“The omega-3 fats in walnuts, which affect levels of the mood-altering brain chemical serotonin, make them useful for dealing with depression. They also contain melatonin, which aids the body’s natural sleep patterns so they may help deal with insomnia.”
Hamlyn. 2007. 100 Health Boosting Foods. Octopus Publishing Group: London.
Psychotic Man Fooled Depressed Kids Into Suicide Pacts
Nadia Kajouji
Mark Drybrough
William Melchert Dinkel - the man who talked to vulnerable and depressed people online and convinced them to get into a suicide pact and take their lives because it was the easiest way to end their suffering.
This is a very sad true story. In 2008, a young girl disappeared from her dorm room at Carleton University. Upon investigation, her body was found in Rideau River. She was a suicide victim.
However, unlike most 19 year old kids who commit suicide, Nadia Kajouji was a well liked girl but she was suffering from a severe depression ever since she had moved to her dorm room. Her friends and family knew a bit but not all.
Upon further investigation, it was revealed that Nadia was chatting with an online buddy whom she thought was a female nurse and with whom she had entered into a suicide pact. The nurse had made her believe, that it is the best way to end this suffering and that is to do it together.
Sadly, Nadia is no longer alive to know that she was chatting with a psycho who was 48 year old, William Melchert Dinkel. William used to identify depressed people online and entered into suicide pacts but had no intention of taking his own life. He advised vulnerable people on the most painless and effective ways to kill themselves.
William was found guilty for aiding Nadia Kajouji and Mark Drybrough from UK to take their lives. He was sentenced for six and half years in jail and 15 years in probation. However, most of the sentence has been suspended. He can easily get away with only 320 days in prison and then return to jail for two days in the next ten years i.e. on the death anniversaries of Kajouji and Drybrough.
I feel this is unfair punishment for the crime he had committed. Two kids lost their lives because he fooled them. Most people on the internet say this is a very light punishment for what he did and are not happy about it.
It is so saddening to see how kids talk to strangers about their depression and feelings. It makes them vulnerable and like most cases, internet can be gross and you can never know what sort of psychopath are you dealing with on the other side of the screen. Some people like William end up playing with the already disturbed minds of some kids and the damage is so brutal that they even end up taking their lives. The crazy man is alive and the depressed kids are no more. It all seems so unfair.
Michael Douglas Says Catherine Was Depressed Cause Of 'Stiff Upper Lip'
Michael Douglas talked to Oprah Winfrey on her show about his wife's depression. He said that it was Catherine Zeta Jone's upbringing that stressed her even more.
He said that she grew up in an environment where she was not allowed to express her emotions and she totally broke from inside when she heard about Michael's throat cancer.
Zeta was diagnosed with bipolar II disorder because of all the mental stress she has been under for all this time dealing with her husband's illness. Michael admitted that his health problems made his wife's illness worse.
Michael said he is the sort of person who makes no fuss about things and needs no attention. So when he heard of his cancer, he got ready for his treatment but Catherine took the strain big time all this while.
According to Michael, Catherine is Welsh and they have this 'stiff upper lip' and do not show their feelings. She was under pressure in the last one and half year but she never spoke about it.
Michael was very candid when he told Oprah, that in the last year his oldest son was in prison, his ex wife was suing him and he got cancer on top of it. It became difficult for Catherine to say in all this while that she was 'depressed'.
But the way she coped with the situation made him feel really proud of Catherine and he is happy that she dealt with her depression in a mature manner. Now Catherine is back to work and is busy shooting for her next film.
Your Genes Decides Your Moods After Drinking Alcohol
Scientists can now explain why some people get so happy and silly by drinking alcohol and why others get depressed and angry. It all comes down to our genetic make up.
The study is done by University of Chicago on 200 subjects aged 21-35 years and is published in Archives of General Psychiatry. It reveals that those who get high from alcohol often get addicted. None of the subjects knew the study was on alcohol consumption. They described their moods through a survey.
Alcohol on its own has stimulants that can make one excited or down. However, the study showed that light drinkers were more sensitive to the effects of drinking and they felt sedated while the heavy drinkers felt happy and positive cause of alcohol consumption.
Though the blood alcohol concentration curves for both types of subjects were similar but their effect of alcohol was drastically different. Their brains responded very differently to alcohol and so their moods were completely in contrast. So, whenever you next see somebody all tipsy keep in mind the role of genetics. And just in case if you don't get depressed or crazily high after drinking, remind yourself that the credit goes to your genes.
Britain’s fattest teenager
Georgia is Britain’s fattest teenager. She’s 17 year old & the more she thinks about her fatness, the more she eats. She also faces an early death, if she doesn’t take some step to loose weight. This must be really depressing for her. People stare at her badly when she goes out of the house, but she is used to it.
While she was in America, she used to play games & she even consulted behavioural coaches, food psychologists and fitness trainers and they encouraged to walk 10,000 steps every day & she lost weight at that time. But at home, she doesn’t have those facilities.
She said at the camp she had been in a controlled environment where she consumed 1,500 calories a day. However, at home she felt isolated as neither her family nor her friends were sticking to a healthy eating plan.
'This is my problem and I know I have to solve it again,' she said
'But I'm only human and I'd be lying if I said I didn't need support.'
Of course she needs moral support & I just hope she loose weight again.
See I don’t have anything against fat people as such & I think it’s really rude on the part of people to target fat, thin, short, dark people. Someone extremely fat had been mean to me a year ago & I said a couple of nasty things regarding fat people. I think it’s the evil nature of the person that makes us say nasty thing about him/her. On top of it, I’ve also noticed fat people calling others fat. I think they are in a position to understand how a person might feel but everyone makes fun of fat people.
I have never been this fat but I did put on some weight during my teenage years & it was a nightmare how everyone used to give me headaches. I wasn’t even fat, but no one spared me the torture. Family & friends…everyone begged me to loose weight & made fun of me on every occasion. Most of the people who made fun of me at that time have become very fat now :P I lost that weight in 8 years, but even today when I meet people, they tell me that I’m too skinny (which I am not) & they can’t stand it. And some of my school pals who met me later on just couldn’t stand it either. They were happy when I was healthy & have turned green when I was not that healthy anymore. And my 1st love also said to me that I wasn’t smart enough for him. I haven’t forgotten anything & I wasn’t even fat, to begin with. I believe these fat people must go through hell. And when you’re young, it’s all the more tough on you.
Writers 'at greater risk of depression', survey finds
Writing is one of the top 10 professions in which people are most likely to suffer from depression, with men particularly at risk from the illness.
Irregular pay and isolation contribute to the propensity for writers to succumb to depression, says the site, with nearly 7% of male artists and writers likely to suffer a major episode of the illness.
Irregular pay and isolation contribute to the propensity for writers to succumb to depression, says the site, with nearly 7% of male artists and writers likely to suffer a major episode of the illness.
Novelist Simon Brett, who has acknowledged his own struggles with depression, agreed with the tenor of the findings, citing writer suicides including Virginia Woolf, Sylvia Plath, Ernest Hemingway, Anne Sexton and Arthur Koestler.
"You spend long hours sitting on your own," he said. "Writing can be wonderful therapy, but you are digging into yourself, and if you are writing fiction and creating characters, a certain amount of self-examination and self-doubt is inevitable." Many writers are also introverted, quiet people, and find it stressful to have their work assessed publicly, Brett added
There are two points in the novel-writing cycle when authors are particularly vulnerable, he believes. "Almost every writer I know goes through the same reaction after a novel is finished – there are 24 hours of euphoria and then all the negative thoughts you have shut out while finishing it come out, and either you get drunk or depressed or get the flu.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2010/dec/13/writers-depression-top-10-risk?CMP=twt_fd
Lost my life
For quite some time, I wanted to write this but somehow I think that I have been avoiding it. I often think about the death of some people like Virginia Woolf & Michael Jackson. These 2 people actually take me in another direction. Virginia Woolf drowned herself; she was a very sensitive lady. And MJ used to take 10 sedatives before going to bed. It must have been such a torture on him.
Depression is a very strange illness. Even Sidney Sheldon was a victim of this illness. I often heard people saying that they are depressed but chronic depression is something serious. When you plunge into depression, your neurotransmitters go down. And only those who have experienced it know how terrible this illness is. Doctors also don’t give a damn; they prescribe sedatives & tranquilizers.
This Ramazan I have been a victim of hopelessness. I try to pray every day & yet I don’t have words. Whatever I want, I have a feeling that it’s not happening today & it’s not going to happen tomorrow; in fact it might not even happen in the next 10 or 20 years. It seems somewhere I lost my life. For a long time, I waited to meet it but now I’m waiting for nothing. Since I’m a very fun loving person, it’s hard to believe that I’m saying so. At this point in life (how ironic), I’m not even sure if I’m in search of life anymore.
There are times I wonder how many people would turn up on my funeral. I hope I don’t die in an accident though. I think I’m not going to do anything stupid to myself as I survived death 8 years ago, which is why I like to have control over my senses 24/7 :P And it also dawned on me that when we dead wake, we see that we have never lived. Henrik Ibsen has made it sound way too beautiful. But when it occurs to you…you are shattered.
Minnie
Minnie is one of our cats & she has been diagnosed with tumor & tomorrow she’s going to have her surgery. It kind of scares the shit out of us. Basically Minne, Princey, Mickey & Fluffy were all born on 24th July’98. A week before their birth, our kitten Chotu was being ran down by our own chauffeur…it was 17th July’ 98. Naturally when these 4 were born, they were more like gifts from the Lord.
Unfortunately, Fluffy died when she was just 7 months old. She got infected by virus & she couldn’t make it. At that time, we were also learning about cats. I was more attached to Princey. Anyone who ever saw him used to fall for him. He had that kind of face & personality. Minnie is my sister’s cat & Mickey is my mom’s baby.
Well Zara & Minnie have a very strong bond. She’s going to turn 11 this year. So far is Mickey is concerned, he has a lot of attitude problem, but he is all love. 2 years ago, Princey died due to urethra blockage; we did whatever we could, but he didn’t survive. That was the worst blow of my life. I have never loved anyone like that. Moreover, Mickey couldn’t take his death & he plunged into depression for 1 & a half year. Mickey is doing fine now, but it took one hell of a long time to get over his brother’s death. The vet told us that cats are so very sensitive…that many a time, they die after the death of their loved ones.
And now we have Minnie who has got tumor. The vet is confident about the surgery & I just hope everything goes okay. In fact, we have changed the vet, cause the first one was not that confident & we were scared as we lost Princey & even another cat Tokyo 2 months ago as his surgery also didn’t go well.
This time we just can’t afford to lose another baby. Although writing this wouldn’t help in any way. We all have been worried about her for quite some time. The thing that would give us contentment would be her life. The surgery is risky though. But we don’t have any other alternative. If she doesn’t go through this surgery, after a couple of months, we have to ask the vet to euthanize her. That is also not a good option. I just hope everything works out this time.
Unfortunately, Fluffy died when she was just 7 months old. She got infected by virus & she couldn’t make it. At that time, we were also learning about cats. I was more attached to Princey. Anyone who ever saw him used to fall for him. He had that kind of face & personality. Minnie is my sister’s cat & Mickey is my mom’s baby.
Well Zara & Minnie have a very strong bond. She’s going to turn 11 this year. So far is Mickey is concerned, he has a lot of attitude problem, but he is all love. 2 years ago, Princey died due to urethra blockage; we did whatever we could, but he didn’t survive. That was the worst blow of my life. I have never loved anyone like that. Moreover, Mickey couldn’t take his death & he plunged into depression for 1 & a half year. Mickey is doing fine now, but it took one hell of a long time to get over his brother’s death. The vet told us that cats are so very sensitive…that many a time, they die after the death of their loved ones.
And now we have Minnie who has got tumor. The vet is confident about the surgery & I just hope everything goes okay. In fact, we have changed the vet, cause the first one was not that confident & we were scared as we lost Princey & even another cat Tokyo 2 months ago as his surgery also didn’t go well.
This time we just can’t afford to lose another baby. Although writing this wouldn’t help in any way. We all have been worried about her for quite some time. The thing that would give us contentment would be her life. The surgery is risky though. But we don’t have any other alternative. If she doesn’t go through this surgery, after a couple of months, we have to ask the vet to euthanize her. That is also not a good option. I just hope everything works out this time.
Nadira Rahman
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